Incorrect RP quotes

Suite à une demande populaire, je ramène le concept ici~
L'idée était initialement pour mon forum mais bon, comme c'est assez basique je vais pas ficher un copyright dessus, et puis je sais que je m'amuserai à en faire ici aussi !

Donc il n'y pas vraiment de règles pour celui-là, pas d'ordre pour poster ou quoi. Le principe est tout simplement de prendre une quote d'une œuvre, d'une personne ou un personnage existant, et de l'associer à votre personnage. Évidemment ce sera basé sur "ce que le personnage pourrait dire" et évidemment de l'humour et des exagérations~
Pour mieux comprendre comment ça se passe vous pouvez voir ces blogs tumblr qui le font :
Incorrect Corpse Party Quotes
Incorrect Smosh Games Quotes
Incorrect Death Note Quotes
Incorrect Danganronpa Quotes
(ou bien évidemment d'autres)

Vous pouvez prendre les quotes de ces blogs, vu que ce sont principalement les plus célèbres, et celles qu'on retrouve le plus souvent (donc on imagine, les meilleures).
Vous êtes libres d'en proposer autant que vous voulez à la fois, autant de fois que vous voulez (même si on évite le double post, n'est-ce pas)~
Si vous avez une idée qui marcherait pile-poil pour le personnage de quelqu'un d'autre vous pouvez aussi la proposer - et évidemment vous pouvez faire des dialogues~
(Désolée aux anglophobes, c'est de l'anglais partout)

Voici mes premières propositions, même si ça va être soft parce que je suis très occupée :

Rozetta: Today we are learning how to make tea.
Rozetta: While you wait for your tea water to boil, reflect on all your regrets.
Rozetta: *sighs*
*eighty-three minutes later*
Rozetta: *crying*

*someone knocks on their room's door*
Owain: You wanna get that?
Jan: And interact with people? No thanks.

Owain: Tell me something. How do you ask a girl out?
Anko: Simple. You open the door and say, "Get out, you're bothering me."

Lillia: Why are people so obsessed with top or bottom? Honestly, I would be excited just to have a bunk bed.
Owain: Lillia, no.

"If I had learned to laugh as a child, I would right now" - Jan

Jan: Wow. You know every one of my stories.
Adele: And you know every one of mine. I guess it’s official… we’re an old married couple.
Jan: Nice!
Adele: We did it!

Anko : You're gonna die.
Rozetta : We're all gonna die.
Owain : (in the background) Ooh a butterfly !

Mikako: Luce assembled a VERY FLATTERING OUTFIT.
Tifani:
Mikako: WE DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE'S CAPABLE OF.
Tifani: I know you're gay but please try to keep your composure.

Owain: What you got there ?
Rozetta: (running to the Cliff) Depression !!
Owain: NO!!!!

Lillia: Is there a word that's a mix between angry and sad?
Rozetta: Malcontented, disgruntled, miserable, desolated...
Owain: Smad.

Owain, texting Luce: What do you call the meme king?
Owain: u madjesty
Luce: How dare you make me read this with my own two eyes.

Owain: Hey, you wanna count shoulders?
Anko: (laughs) Okay.
Owain: (counting his own shoulders) one, two
Owain: (putting his arm around Anko) three, four
Owain: (climbing over him to reach the next seat) FIVE, SIX, SEVEN

Rozetta: (to Owain) Thanks, dad.
Rozetta: ...Why is everyone staring at me?
Lillia: You just called Owain 'dad'.
Rozetta: What? No, I didn't. I said 'thanks, man'.
Owain: Do you see me as a father figure, Rozie?
Rozetta: No, if anything, I see you as a bother figure because you're always bothering me.
Lillia: Hey, show your father some respect!

Anko: Are you gay?
Luce: No.
Anko: You can tell me.
Luce: I’m not.
Anko: It’s okay. I’m gay. Mikako’s gay.
Mikako: Bye
Anko: Oh, sorry. She’s bi.
Mikako: No, I’m going home for the day. I’m gay.

Rozetta: And now for a message of hope.
Owain: A message of hope! Right on time.
Rozetta: Everything's garbage.
Owain: Ah.

"Oh, I survived. Brilliant. Love it when I do that." -Owain after being chased by a wild cat.

(that's a lot of Owain and Rozetta D% gotta admit i love their dynamic)

Hisahi: Hey Rozetta, do you want me to do a tarot card reading for you?
Rozetta: Oh, sure!
Hisashi: *lays down cards* Alright, this one tells me you’re a precious angel, this one says your smile is heavenly, and-
Rozetta: Hisashi, these aren’t even tarot cards, they’re just pictures of me.

Tifani, watching Luce drink coffee: Why are you making that face? Is the coffee bad or something?
Luce: Owain put salt in my coffee as a prank, but I'm going to continue to drink it because I'm petty and I refuse to let him win.

Katsue: How the hell did you get in here?
Owain: I could ask you the same question!
Katsue:
Owain: okay, I could ask you a different question

Owain: [enters the room in a new outfit]
Owain: Jan, tell me, how do I look?
Jan: With your eyes, Owain.

Luce: *hears noise*
Luce: what the FUCK is up SPIRITS, no what did you say, WHAT THE FUCK DUDE, STEP THE FUCK UP SPIRITS

Owain: I can't find Rozetta anywhere!
Luce: Okay, Calm down. What does she look like?
Owain: (tearing up) Beautiful.

Katsue: Now release all the sounds that are trapped in your mind.
Agnes: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

Tifani: That shirt is great, Luce.
Luce: Thanks.
Tifani: But I'd bet it would look even better on Mikako's floor.
Luce: Um...
Mikako: Are you hitting on Luce... for me?

Tifani: Yeah, Katsue’s mad at me right now, but I have a few tricks up my sleeve. I don’t want to brag but, I have a lot of experience with women being mad at me.

Tifani: Tomorrow is another day.
Rozetta/Agnes: Yeah, but it might be worse.

Tifani, stroking Katsue's hair: You're so tiny and adorable
Katsue, half asleep: I could literally kick your ass right now
Tifani, looking at Katsue with heart eyes: I know

Owain: I’ve only known Rozetta for a day and a half, but if anything were to happen to her I’d kill everyone in this room and then myself.
Tifani: ….
Luce: ….
Jan: ….
Anko: Owain Sweetheart no…

Mikako: We both look very handsome tonight.
Luce: You know, if you’d just said that I looked handsome, I would’ve said “So do you”.
Mikako: I couldn’t take that chance.

Owain: Bad things keep happening to me. Like I have bad luck or something.
Jan: You don’t have bad luck.
Jan: The reason bad things happen to you is because you’re a dumbass.

Anko: Are you a big spoon or a little spoon?
Owain: I’m a knife.
Tifani, from across the room: He’s a little spoon.

Tifani: Guess what number I’m thinking of!
Luce, trying: 420?
Tifani: No. That’s really immature of you, Luce. Someone guess and please take this seriously.
Naomi, just entering the room: It’s 69.
Tifani: Hey, I’m mature enough to pick a different number!
Tifani, turning back to Luce: Yeah, it was 69.

Rozetta's Clone: *pointing at Rozetta* Shoot her! She's the clone!
Owain: *aiming gun at the clone* The real Rozetta would NEVER pass up an opportunity to die!

Jan: Forget it. I'm not getting into any more stupid debates with you.
Anko: Water is not wet.
Jan: How the fuck is water not wet it's water--

Luce: Agnes, pass me my keys.
Agnes: *tosses printer*
Luce: I said my keys.
Agnes: I thought you said printer!
Luce: Why the FUCK would I say printer?

Mikako: You're kinda my moose.
Luce: *smiles* It's muse.
Mikako: I know. I just wanted to see you smile.

*first meeting*
Hisashi: I have feelings for you!
Rozetta: *gasps* I have feelings for you!
Narrator: The feeling was friendship, but neither had ever experienced it.

*texting*
Owain: I've heard people saying my name twice in my room. It's either ghosts or hallucinations.
Rozetta: It's me outside. You want some muffins?
Owain: What kind?
Rozetta: Zucchini, but it tastes like banana nut.
Owain: Bananas can nut?!?!?!?!?!
Rozetta: You know what, I'll keep my muffins.

Adele: Hey, guys, gentle reminder not to eat too much candy before bed.
Mikako: No.
Adele: This was a gentle reminder, yet your words of defiance bring me ungodly amounts of rage.

Owain: Fist me.
Anko: I--What the fuck?
Owain: *holds out fist for a fist bump*
Anko: Right, that's what you--Right, okay, Jesus fucking Chr--

Owain: It was lit!
Luce: The place was lit up?
Owain: No, it was LIT!
Rozetta: There was a fire?

Mikako: let me get this straight-
Mikako: or rather, let me run something BI you.
Tifani: let’s PAN this out!
Lillia: let us ace-cess the situation
Anko: im gay

Owain: What’s your biggest fear?
Rozetta: Being forgotten.
Owain: …
Owain: That’s deep.
Owain: Mine is the kool-aid man but I feel kinda stupid about it now.

Adele: I am god! I will tell you all that you want to know!
Jan: Tell me how much you love me.
Adele, blushing: A… whole lot…

Anko: Rozetta, I don’t like you.
Rozetta: Sorry, what did you say?
Anko: You heard me.
Rozetta: *in her head* And it turns out I actually didn’t hear what the fuck you just said.

Hisashi: I hate when I offer food to someone and they say yes.
Hisashi: Give it back
Hisashi: I was just being nice
Hisashi: GIVE ME THAT NACHO

Owain : I can be bad. I can be mean.
Rozetta : Okay. Say a swear word.
Owain : No.
Rozetta : Insult me.
Owain : No!
Rozetta : You can't be mean.

*texting*
Adele : You don't have to sign your name on texts.
Agnes : Dear Adele, suggestion noted. Sincerely, Agnes.

Tifani : Ugh, my knees are so sore--
Katsue : Your next words better be "because I was praying all night" or I'm going to scream.

"I like having conversations with kids. Grown-ups never ask me what my third favourite reptile is." - Adele

Jan : Get kidnapped. you’ll find out who your real friends are. I promise you that.
Owain : I just feel like there are steps you could probably take before this one

Rozetta : Owain is just full of sunshine and candy and hope, and every time I try to tell him the world is on fire, he just hands me a marshmallow to roast.

Andi : Are you busy?
Hisahi : Yes.
Andi : Cool listen to this.

Bon j'arrête j'ai trop de ménage à faire et ma lessive vient de se terminer

Anko: I will ruin your happiness, no matter the cost!
Rozetta: My happiness?
Rozetta: (to Owain) I’m happy?

Hisashi: Mikako Bery is the most complicated person that I’ve ever met. I mean who says exactly what they’re thinking? What kind of game is that?

Adele (through text): Hey Jan can we talk?
Jan: One moment I can’t find my phone.
Adele: Ok
Adele: …

Jan: Leonardo DiCaprio is neither a leo or capricorn, he’s a scorpio and that pisses me off.
Owain: Leonardo descorpio

Owain: But Rozetta’s friend said that-
Hisashi: Wait, there’s no way that’s true. Rozetta doesn’t have any friends.

Lillia: Agnes, what is a ‘metaphor’?
Agnes: My life is a trainwreck.
Lillia: I know, but what’s a metaphor?

Agnes: Stressed.
Rozetta: Depressed.
Jan: Possessed.
Adele: Obsessed.
Lillia: Impressed.
Owain: Chicken breast.
Everyone: …What?
Owain: I just wanted to join in.

Owain: So I said to myself, think like Jan.
Jan: And this is what you’ve arrived at? Manipulate and use people to achieve your own twisted idealistic goals? It’s like you don’t know me at all!

Luce: What the fuck.
Mikako: You’re going to have to be more specific, I do a lot of what the fuck kind of stuff.

Andi: How are you?
Hisashi: Not well. The head ache just goes and comes.
(Mikako enters)
Hisashi: Oh look there it is!

Rozetta: We shall begin by drinking the blood of the successors that came before you.
Owain: Dude, no.
Lillia: Don’t worry, it’s cherry juice.

Bonjour

Andi : Fine! Judge all you want, but
Andi : *points to Anko* "Hosts orgies"
Andi : *points to Tifani* "Participates in said orgies"
Andi : *points to Naomi* "Only speaks in sarcasm"
Andi : *points to Luce* "Needs anger management"
Andi : *points to Jan* "Has a "shadow self""
Andi : *points to Owain* "MANCHILD!"
Andi : *storms off*

Au revoir

edit: bon okay j'en ajoute une

Jan : Our can opener is broken.
Adele : So is it now a can’t opener???
Jan : . . . I can’t believe I fell in love with you of all the people.

(that's a lot of Heathers but this movie/musical is amazing)

Rozetta : I haven't got a phone.
Aran : Ok.
Rozetta : I smashed it.
Aran : Ok.
Rozetta : Like, on purpose.
Aran : Ok.
Rozetta : So you can't call me.
Aran : Ok.

Mikako : You look like hell.
Rozetta : I just got back.

Rozetta : Suicide is a private thing.
Aran : You're throwing your life away to become a statistic, that's the least private thing I can think of.

"My teen angst bullshit now has a body count." - Reed

Owain : Why are so you such a megabitch ?
Mikako : Cause I can be.

Hisashi : That was so extra, calm down
Mikako : Extra is my middle name
Mikako : and my first and my last
Mikako : Hiya im Extra Extra Extra, nice to meet ya

Rozetta: *sneaks in through the window at 2 AM*
Luce (flicking on the light and turning around in her chair): So, where were you?
Rozetta: I- I was with Aran!
Aran (turning around in his own chair): Want to try again?

Jan: What time is it?
Owain: I dunno, pass me that saxophone and I’ll find out.
Owain: *blows saxophone loudly*
Luce, distantly: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT 2AM?!
Owain: It’s 2am.

Owain: and this is my house
Rozetta: what’s upstairs ?
Owain: stairs don’t talk

Aran: why are you on fire?
Rozetta: this is just kind of how my day is going

Owain: Anko, we've gotta respect women!
Anko: If she breathes, she a thot
Owain: All women are queens!

Aran: the best revenge, really, is being nice.
Rozetta, in the distance: or murder.

Je vous ai terriblement manqué, je le sais.
Et comme je n'ai pas suivi ce topic depuis très longtemps, je vais à 100% faire des doublons, mais éCOUTEZ JE FAIS CE QUE JE PEUX--


Kidnapper: We have your child.
Jan: We... don't have a child?
Kidnapper: Then who threw a tantrum when we took away his limited pokemon mechanical pencil?
Jan: Oh my god, they have Owain.

"God gave me depression because if my ambitions were unchecked I would have bested Him in hand to hand combat by age 13" - Jan

Owain: Hi
Anko: Sorry, I dont do "small talk". Ask me about the last 12 years I've spent farming onions instead.

"My kink is when everybody shuts the fuck up" - Reed

"I would fistfight my bitch self if I could" - Jan

"What if he doesn't like me like that? What if he’s just being nice?" - Rozetta, at the altar, about to marry Owain

Anko: My reason for doing things is 1. spite and 2. the aesthetic. That's it.
Anko: Okay, I lied
Anko: 3. attention

Adele: Trans people can do anything!
Rin: I'mm gonna commit arson
Adele: Trans people can (and should) commit arson !!!


Idk j'ai vu cette quote je me suis dit bon go


Lauria: One day I hope to be the girl who walks into a room and all eyes are on her.
Owain: The trick is to get a really big hat and then scream.

Aran: I don't know how much you know about the ocean, but me? I'm a fucking master. Ask me anything about the ocean.
Lucas: Is it big?
Aran: Probably.

Owain: If homo sapiens were in fact HOMO sapiens, could that be why they're extinct?
Jan: Owain, homo sapiens are people.
Owain: Hey, I'm not judging here.

*texting*
Adele: there's a moth on the outside of the bathroom door, can you come get it
Adele: please hurry because I'm gonna cry
Adele: Kendra
Adele: KENDRA
Kendra: Kendra is dead. You're next. Love, Moth.

Owain: There are only three ways to do things: the right way, the wrong way, and the Owain way.
Jan: Isn't that just the wrong way?
Owain: Yeah, but it's faster.


Aran: Okay, I’ll add on to your ‘a’ to make ‘at.’
Owain: Good one! I’ll add on to your ‘at’ to make ‘rat.’
Rozetta: I will add on to your ‘rat’ to make ‘biostratigraphic.’
Owain: *knocks over the board*


Hisashi: Your insolence goes too far!
Mikako: Wrong. It can go a lot further!


Reed: Gotta love knitting needles. I can make a scarf. I can make a hat. I can stab your eyes out. I can make mittens.
Aran: …What was that middle part?
Reed: I can make a hat.

Owain: Please, Luce! Rozie’s going to be home any minute now–if she sees this, she’s going to think I’m an idiot!
Luce: And this would be news to her how?
Owain: [pouts]
Luce: Great! The lower lip thing…


Jan: You guys cause a distraction.
Owain [drops to the ground and starts doing push-ups]: One… two… three…
Anko [throwing raisins]: Raisins! Raisins! They used to grapes.


Mikako: No one blackmails Owain but us!
Jan: Yeah! Messing with him is a privilege, not a right.


Owain: Don’t panic–I’m in charge!
Mikako: That’s why we’re panicking!


Hisashi: Have you not listened to anything I’ve said?
Mikako: I certainly haven’t, but I didn’t think you’d noticed.


Owain: Most dangerous places on earth: volcanoes
Rozetta: Why?
Owain: Nowhere to grab a bite to eat.


"I don’t have a train of thought I have seven trains on 4 tracks that narrowly avoid each other when the paths cross and all the conductors are screaming." -Rozetta


Owain: What’s your blood type?
Aran: How would I know?
Tifani: How would you not?
Aran: Who am I, Karl Landsteiner, discoverer of blood groups?
Tifani: You don’t know your own blood type, but you know who discovered them?


"Yeah I have a double major in gay and stupid" - Anko


Adele: It’s hard being the mom friend sometimes, but I love my friends and that’s what matters-
Lillia: Adele! I tried to make ramen in the coffee pot and I broke everything!


Rozetta: Now, drop your knives.
Reed: Which ones?
Rozetta: All of them.
Reed: Oh boy. Better pull up a lawn chair guys, we’re gonna be here a while.


Owain: Boyfriend? I don’t want to be Rozie’s boyfriend.
Aran: Well, what do you want, then?
Owain: I don’t know. I just want to be with her. All the time. I want to hear about her day and tell her about mine. I want to hold her hand and smell her hair. But I don’t want to be her stupid boyfriend.